|Occupation||Former childhood nurse of Queen Elizabeth I|
|Episode count||6 Episodes, 2 Specials|
|Played by||Patsy Byrne|
Nursie (real name "Bernard") is a character in Blackadder II. She was played by Patsy Byrne and appeared in all six episodes. She also appeared in two of the Blackadder specials: Blackadder's Christmas Carol and Blackadder: Back & Forth.
Once Queenie's childhood nurse, by the time of her appearances in Blackadder II, Nursie is either senile or otherwise irreversibly stupid, but remains at court at the side of the Queen. Nursie frequently embarrasses herself and Queenie by openly recounting tales of the Queen's childhood, prompting Queenie's standard reply of "Shut up, Nursie." She is also known for her complete non sequitur in conversation. Lord Blackadder describes her as "a sad, insane old woman with an udder fixation."
Nursie is apparently unmarried, as in the episode "Potato" she accepts a proposal of marriage from Captain Redbeard Rum (played by Tom Baker), though he is eaten by cannibals before the marriage can take place. In a bout of absurdism quite typical of Nursie, on hearing of his death she takes his beard, attaches it to her own face and swears to "wear it always" as an act of remembrance.
She always attends fancy dress parties as a cow with three udders.
- Nursie is a caricature of the doting nursery maid or nanny, who at the drop of a hat launches into long disquisitions on her charge's brilliance and wit, and intended as a parody of Juliet's Nurse in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, as the nurse also admits to being something of a fool, proclaiming, "were not I thine [Juliet's] only nurse, I would say thou hadst suck'd wisdom from thy teat."